To: John McCain
Re: Your mailbox is full
You have exceeded (after the first hour of tonight's debate) the storage capacity of the "American people" for accepting "my friends," and its singular counterpart "my friend," as a folksy term of endearment. You do not have sufficient friends in the United States to continue using this expression ad nauseum in nationally televised live events.
Please contact your campaign administrator for further instructions on how to delete this phrase from your hard drive.
On the Air IT department