The Knife

Drink, drink and be merry

>> This weekend is the Malibu Wine Classic at the Malibu Civic Center, otherwise known as five hours of something close to bliss with wines from Alma Rosa, Fiddlehead, Qupe, L'Aventure and many others, including those from the 'bu contingency. There's also food (highlights: All' Angelo, American Flatbread, Il Grano), but this one is really about the wine. The only risk is that you might enjoy yourself (cough) too much. Not that I'd know anything about that. It's a benefit for ChildHelp, a 39-y.o. org dedicated to helping victims of child abuse. And the price is a mere $79 -- which, as my dad said last night, "is less than I would expect." Be like The Knife and listen to her father. Tickets here.

>> Currently, I am the proud owner of some of the most delicious coffee I've ever brewed at home (and yes, that includes LA Mill and Intelligentsia). It's got the random name of Blazing Raspberry, although it is NOT flavored. It is, however, supposedly rare, definitely strong and from Crossroads Cafe in Panajachel, Guatemala, which is where my friend Bill Higgins bought it. Buying it from the U.S. is a little complicated, but I daresay worth it.

At $45 a pound, coffee that's a ripoff

Intelligentsia and Groundwork: Two local
suppliers of the real, $99-a-half-pound thing

Remember the World's Most Expensive Coffee? And how there was an online supplier who seemed to offer it for a fraction of the price? How so, I wondered? And, voila! Answers.

Before I delve too deeply into the explanations, I should point out that Intelligentsia was only one of seven coffee suppliers who laid claim to the record-setting auction lot. (The others were the LA-based Groundwork, The Roasterie, Roastmasters.com, Zoka Coffee Roaster & Tea Co., 49th Parallel Coffee Roasters and Coffee Klatch Roasting.)

Another thing: There's nothing surprising that this batch was declared the winner in a national competition. As Geoff Watts of Intelligentsia puts it: "It always wins. It's like the Kenyan marathon runners."

However, that doesn't mean the end of bragging rights. Says Alex Russan of Groundwork: "We own two bags of the standard production lot, one 50lb bag of the auction lot AND the ONLY BAG IN THE WORLD of the peaberries from this farm -- this is very notable. Peaberries are cherries that developed only one instead of two beans inside and are thought to be more flavorful. Groundwork owns every peaberry of Finca Esmarelda's geisha coffee."

OK!

Now, on to why $198-per-pound coffee could be sold for $45. Bottom line: Caveat emptor.

This comes from Intelligentsia, which launched its sale of the $99 per half-pound coffee last week. Watts, Intelligentsia's director of coffee/green coffee purchaser writes:

Just to shed some light on the subject... the coffee being sold on the Geisha coffee website is not the same as the auction lot. It comes from the same farm -- Hacienda La Esmeralda -- but is a different coffee.

GeishaCoffee.com: A bargain on the world's most expensive coffee?

This morning, Intelligentsia sent out a press release/party invitation announcing the debut of Hacienda La Esmeralda's Geisha coffee, which Intelligentsia bought at auction for the record-setting price of $130/lb. If you like the samples they'll be brewing at Thursday night's party (which is open to the public), it can be yours for $99 per half pound.

Yikes, yowsa, et. al. But I wondered what others might charge.

So now I offer you this, with the caveat that it makes no sense to me: An online retail outlet for a Kentucky-born Panama coffee plantation owner, GeishaCoffee.com, offers Hacienda La Esmerelda at $33.95 for a 12-oz. whole-bean bag.

As they say in my country, Huh? The site says the coffee is the 2006/07 crop, which presumably is the same one sold at auction back in May. So how does a coffee that wholesales for $130 per pound become a retail product that sells  for about $45.25 per pound? And that doesn't even take the weight loss of roasting into consideration.

I have a call into GeishaCoffee.com in search of answers. In the meantime, here's a Forbes slide show of most-expensive coffees, produced back when the civet-poop coffee stil reigned supreme.

Test Kitchen: Coffee, Part 1

My Labor Day weekend: Brewing the best coffee beans in LA (Intelligentsia, LA Mill) in the wrong coffeemaker. Conclusion: Trader Joe's has a great racket going on.

I've heard the arguments. TJ's, like Starbucks and other outlets, over-roast or burn the beans, killing all subtleties of flavor, etc. Maybe. But if you have an ordinary drip cofeemaker, you're probably better off buying TJ's (less expensive) coffee. Unsubtle beans for an unsubtle coffeemaker are a good match; the dark roast bludgeons its way to the front. Subtle beans in said maker get lost, producing a coffee that's thin, sweetish and otherwise meh.

The right maker for rareified beans is a French press. Or a glass Chemex. Or a Clover. Something that requires more temperature control, careful grinding, forethought and energy.

And that's the genius part. If you don't want to deal with that, if you want a coffeemaker that you can operate blindfolded with one hand thank you very much, you'll drink TJ's for life. You'll think Intelligentsia is an oxymoron.

Or -- you become a convert and coffee becomes a slippery slope. It's a short step from unearthing a French press from the back of the storage closet to "needing" a burr grinder. And from there, God knows. Craig Min at LA Mill uses reverse-osmosis water; he made the best cappucino I've ever had.

Tomorrow, Part 2: Intelligentsia vs. LA Mill.

[French press instructions with thanks to coffeegeek.com; click through for full size]

Clover Coffee: If Will Smith doesn't have one in his trailer, he will soon.

Doesn't look like much, does it? Nonetheless, meet the new, $12,000 object of caffineated desire: the Clover. LA Mill account exec Alex Collins explains it as the invention of two espresso-obsessed tech geeks who figured out how to automate the French press and added an ultra fine-mesh screen (40, 70 or 100 microns). For coffeehouses, it means they can cater to coffee freaks who won't pay, say, $160 per pound for Kopi Luwak, but might pay $9 for a cup of the civet-poop coffee. For the coffee freaks, it means tasting everything a bean has to offer. A Clover cup of LA Mill's organic Brazil Poco Fundo was dark, sweet and stayed that way.

This one was photographed at the LA Mill booth at this weekend's Western Foodservice & Hospitality Expo, but it's already in residence at Intelligentsia; LA Mill will have its own when it opens a Silverlake coffeehouse this fall (with foodstuffs provided by Providence's Michael Cimarusti, who tipped me to the Clover in the first place).

Intelligentsia Coffee: Starbucks can roast its beans in hell

This photograph was taken at Intelligentsia Coffee at 12:35 pm this afternoon -- little more than a half hour after the Chicago-based operation opened its Silver Lake store for the first time. The steamed-milk heart comes standard; so does, apparently, the adoration. The coffee? Terrific, and destined to become better; the company plans to open a Los Angeles roasting facility this fall.  Inside, customers were already buying Intelligentsia T-shirts; outside, a woman sat at one of the cafe tables and talked on her mobile: "It's a real coffee shop. You've got to see it." Get in line.

Intelligentsia, 3922 W. Sunset Blvd. (323) 663-6173 

Milk on Beverly Blvd. has the best lattes in Los Angeles.

You are welcome to disagree, although I'd ask that you try Milk's first. They use coffee from LA Mill in Alhambra. However, Milk will have a fierce competitor for the latte title when LA Mill owner Craig Min opens his own coffee shop in Silver Lake later this year.

Milk, 7290 Beverly Blvd. (323) 949-6455