The Geisha House winner is Ipsedixit.
For the following insight:
"Rocky."
Nothing like punching large sides of cattle.
Do I really think that's the best food scene? Of course not. But it was inventive, it made me laugh and most of all...
I COULD TRACK DOWN THE WRITER'S EMAIL.
Ipsedixit didn't leave me his email, either, but I recognized his tagline from frequent postings at Chowhound. And there he has a profile, which contains his email. (The Knife is nothing if not persistent.)
Unfortunately, I have no idea who "Diana" is; if I did, I'd offer her a bottle of wine as a consolation prize for this magnificently paranoid post:
...Is it the worst restaurant movie scene ever if viewed by a neurotic germ-o-phobic person like me? Without a doubt. The diner scene in the inane Tom Green film, "Road Trip," where DJ Qualls (“Kyle”) sends back his French Toast to a portly, unhygienic cook who proceeds to place said French Toast down his pants before returning it to the table, is simultaneously comical and incredibly disturbing. In a city where health grades are posted in all restaurant windows, Los Angelos know all too well the anxiety felt when they learn their favorite restaurant is given a “B” rating. What exactly is going on behind those swinging kitchen doors?
Watching a scene like the “French Toast down the pants” clip in "Road Trip" amplifies that anxiety to a whole other level. If my $40 petite filet is not cooked properly, do I send it back and risk it accidentally “falling” on the floor next to a (used) rat trap? If my soup is cold, do I say something, or pretend it’s a gazpacho, rather than risk receiving a “spit stew”? "Road Trip" has forever tainted my naïve impressions that restaurants will happily accommodate most customer requests. Is this a good thing? Am I saving myself from food poisoning and bacterial infection? Or am I paranoid? And devoid of the opportunity to receive a properly cooked steak?
Diana has all of our sympathies. If she sends me her email, she'll be able to soothe her anxieties with a nice bottle of red.
Finally, the entry I probably would have awarded first place if (a) I knew how to contact "Jeff" and (b) if it weren't for the fact that his IP address suggests that he works at Variety, which would sort of be cheating. In any case, it's pretty damn cool.





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